well firstly i dunnoe whether there are people reading my blog...
secondly been emoing since last thurs...
if u ask y well isnt it obvious enough... I screw my Os big time...
it just sux big time....
firstly twin bro scored like 14 and i scored 31??
wtf??
when i saw the result last thurs... i was like wth?? didnt cry at first... but inside wa really hurting and i tell at that point of time nothing seems important to me... it really felt like the end of the world... i was sad partially abt the results but the worse was i really let down my parent who worked har just to send to school and stuff... it just felt so wrong...
but after sometime when my mum came i was like back to my ownself started smiling but deep inside only god knows....
yeah so thats abt my Os results... feeling much better now i think??
just cameback from campfeast yesterday...overall for me campfeast was great...
good exprience for me.. i was a TANGO 4 apc... i really learnt alot about being a cadet officer its not easy and the same time its not that difficult... we had to book in Sunday...
was supposed to go for jamming session but didnt cause i was emoing and also tired.. so cancelled.. in the end i just met the guys at AMK hub to have dinner... then book in...
had briefing then disscussion... finally rest for the day...
woke up had breakfast.. then in processing was there till abt ten b4 making my way to meet mr shawal for my decision making ...
And I SCREW up cause now im having second thoughts whether to stay back.... rank at stake ppl... to some ppl they just might say why waste time wif ncc... just ncc... then all the start all the nonsense abt ncc dont bring me anywhere think abt my future blah3... im like what the heck??
thats the only place thing that keeps me going and make me feel happy...
aRGGHH F**K those ppl... some just dont understand the passion...
thats all i got now... i have already lost my Os im not going to loose the ONLY thing that keeps me alive...
im going to be my oldself arghh emo...
THIS IS JUST SO WRONG....
then head back to hq... cant emo at hq cause its campfeast but i just kept thinking abt my results... second day nothing much happen i did emo during outprocessing ... but just cant help myself to top the emoing cause evryone was happy...
i felt really out of place..
my guys were all like 13 14 pointers and some are like 7 6 and even 2... me 31??
where to go for now....my O lvl cert?? passion ??
Love...
i cant even think abt it... i really cant think..
seriously... i dont think its for me now...
P.S. im may sound like im contradicting myself..
thats it for now...
True love? I used to believe it existed, but when you’ve had your heart torn out and thrown on the floor, you just don’t care anymore.
well till here then
to be continued
